The original post which I had typed out and ready to go for this week has been postponed until next week!
Well, because life has a way of getting in the middle of things!
Life throws curve balls which hit us out of no where!
However, these unexpected turn of events allows The Lord to completely change our train of thought and then HE writes a totally new post!
That's exactly why this post is being written, and the one which was scheduled for this week will be shared next week, unless the Lord changes it once again!
Last week, and these past few days, have been challenging.
BUT, in the midst of the difficulties and stress, it has been a time of experiencing God's AMAZING grace and peace!
"Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee. Trust ye in the Lord for ever: for in the Lord Jehovah is everlasting strength."
Last Monday (January 23th), I got word that my step-dad passed away earlier that morning.
Due to circumstances, I lost contact with him about three years ago. However, he was my step-dad whom I loved very much and who took excellent care of my Mom right up until the day the Lord called her home.
The news brought with it many memories and emotions. The only way I could see my way through was by talking to my Heavenly Father, and laying it ALL at His feet and exchanging it for His grace and peace.
"Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need."
Tuesday (January 24th) was my birthday. Another year older, but not quite sure if I'm any wiser!
Tuesday was also the day my beloved went to see our primary care doctor for symptoms he had been experiencing for a few days. She diagnosed him with the flu and loaded him up with all kinds of medications.
I was so very thankful because I figured within a few days he would be bouncing back to his "old self"!
Well that's not what happened!
Instead of getting better, he continued to spiral downward. His fever remained constantly between 102 and 103. He had a severe headache and said that even his hair hurt! He could barely walk from aching all over and was hardly eating or drinking anything.
This was definitely not my man.
Not my strong, fix anything, do anything, "give his shirt off his back for anyone", healthy, happy, helpful husband.
Brian ended up in the ER on Friday morning after having a chest x-ray which was normal and after seeing our doctor. His doctor didn't know what it was and thought it best to send him to the ER to get IV fluids since he was starting to dehydrate.
When Brian called to tell me what was happening, instead of panicking and bursting into tears, my response was, "Good. I was praying that's what they would do!"
You see, the night before, my very best friend of twenty plus years stopped by the house to drop off three containers of Chick-fil-a soup! I met her in the laundry room to keep her from entering our germ infested house! We talked and she made me laugh and then she left.
Within a few seconds, she came back in with some antibacterial hand sanitizer and she said, "Well, since I came back in, let's pray together!" So there we were in my laundry room and she began to pray.
Of course she prayed for Brian to get better and for me not to get whatever he had and things like that.
But then she prayed the Lord would give me courage which I have never experienced before. To be brave. To deal calmly with whatever was before Brian and I. To keep my hand firmly planted in the hand of Jesus and not take it out. To be surrounded by the peace of the Lord. To walk with Jesus one step at a time, not looking ahead with fear.
I was listening very intently as she prayed, and "amening" in agreement.
But even more importantly, the Lord was listening very intently to what she was saying, and He did indeed answer her specific requests!
If you know me, I am NOT one who tends to handle a crises very well. BUT GOD (I LOVE those two words) walked me through these past days in a way which ONLY He could. With HIS peace, HIS grace, HIS courage.
I was very concerned about Brian, BUT at the very same time the Lord flooded me with HIS peace and calm reassurance!
Having a chronic illness makes it ten times harder to care for someone else when they become ill. BUT GOD (did I mention that I LOVE those two words!) gave me HIS strength, to not only take care of myself, but to also help my husband. To be able to monitor his fever, do give him his medication, do the laundry, wash the dishes, make him lunch and dinner. Yes, dinner may have only been soup, but hey, it was dinner!
"Father, thank You so very much for Your unending grace, peace and strength which You continue to pour out upon Brian and I as we walk through these storms of life. Thank You for Your presence. Thank You for friends who are holding us up before Your Throne of Grace. Thank You for always holding our hands and never letting go. You are indeed a good, good Father, Who is nothing but faithful.
In Jesus' Holy and Precious Name, Amen."
I've been writing this post over the past week or so, and I really thought that I was going to be able to end it by saying, "And Brian is feeling so much better!"
But that's not the case!
In fact, he went back to the ER this past Monday morning (January 30th) and this time they admitted him. So as of now, my beloved is currently in the hospital having all kinds of tests done, loads of blood work drawn, and being poked and prodded, all in an effort to pinpoint the cause of his illness.
I miss my man like crazy and I so want him to be back home with me feeling like his "old self"! But I know for now he is where he needs to be, and the Lord is taking good care of both of us!
When I hung up the phone yesterday with Brian, the last thing he said to me was, "Remember, Baby, God is faithful!"
There's just NO other way to explain why I'm not falling into a million shattered pieces and crying my eyes out, than to say it's ALL THE LORD'S DOING!
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May God Bless You,